reflection

I look in the mirror a lot and I am not sure who the girl in front of me is. I don't know what makes me unique or special or attractive. I have to write a cabaret about my life and my goals and then I think why does anyone care? Who will show up to listen to my stories. I am the same as the next girl on the subway or in the cross walk. I wonder why someone so smart would like me. I try so hard to be smart when I am average. I try so hard to cover up the blemishes on my face. I want so much to be someone special. I hate watching everyone else. When will someone watch me? I am so twisted and lost that I have no idea who I am anymore. I have a whole life of memories in my head. I have looked through the same pair of eyes for 23 years, but I still feel blank. I guess I know I am different from other people, but I don't know why anyone would love me.