connections

We are desperately searching for something to hold onto, someone to notice your face, something visceral and real. We dart out of subway cars like anxious race-horses released from the gate only to find that we have no idea where we are going. This is a city filled with anonymous people. Sometimes it becomes unbearable to be so alone. I want to clutch at a body, I want to feel skin or a warm breath at the back of my neck, I need to connect to someone. One is constantly surrounded by people and yet there are no connections and you are left empty and unsatisfied. We constantly search for saftey and stability, yet the world we live in is filled with invasions and disturbance. I keep having dreams where I am safe and whole and then I wake up and I can't help feeling utterly alone and unsettled. Something is wrong and I need to fill that void, but I am not sure how.